Career and Life Planning Guidebook for Medical Residents

The Medical Relationship Have you included your spouse in your job search process? The sooner you invite them into the process, the more connected and supported you’ll feel during your search. It’s a sure way to set yourself up for a better outcome! Decision-making comes with an indispensable element that will not only make it possible for decisions to be made, but also create more harmony in your relationship overall. That element is healthy communication. How can you understand your spouse’s needs and communicateyourneeds inarespectfulwaythatdevelops trust and connection? Let’s learn more strategies! Did you know?? One of the key ingredients for a successful relationship is clear, honest, and compassionate communication. Communicating clearly and often, and being a good listener, is the top strategy for a healthy relationship. 5 R E A D : Communicating Together Set aside some time together to read through and complete the following exercises as a couple. Allow these steps to help you make a strong decision together that is a win-win! Step 1: Commit to non-violent communication. Have you heard of this term before? Non-violent communication is an approach developed by Marshall Rosenberg in the 1960s and detailed in his 1999 book, Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life that provides a simple (but not easy!) method for clear, empathetic communication. You can use it to express yourself and what really matters to you without usingblame, guilt, humiliation, or threats. The result, if used correctly, helps people solve conflicts and express their needs without feeling judged or attacked. This method is useful in all relationships, not just your marriage! The method focuses on four steps: observances (rather than evaluations/judgments), feelings, needs, and requests. The following is a filter you can put your thought through before you express it. When I see/hear _______, I feel _________ because I need _______. Would you be willing to or I would love it if you _________ . Example: When I see you working so much, I feel sad because I need to feel more support. I would love it if you could take just a few moments to help me with something. Another highly recommended book is called Crucial Conversations by Grenny, Schiliter, and McMillian. The book is about building specific conversation skills to bring down the “emotional temperature” of a 77 WWW.PHYSICIANCAREERPLANNING.COM